Behind Closed Doors
by Tatyana Random
Summary: How do two unexpected students fall in love during the notorious seventh year? Can they keep this forbidden love secret from the danger of Voldemort and the prejudices of their friends while trying to stay alive? Please READ and REVIEW!
1. Undeniable Attraction

Disclaimer: As you all well know, I don't own anything or anyone for the Potter universe

A/N: I just looked on my profile and noticed that I haven't been on here since last year. I sort of had to talk myself into finally writing this because it's been in my laptop for months. I'm not going to lie to anyone on here; if I am to continue this, I'll need reviews. It has to be better than the amount of review I received on my previous stories, or else I'll get discouraged.

Summary: How do two unexpected students fall in love during the notorious seventh year? Can they keep this forbidden love secret from the danger of Voldemort and the prejudices of their friends? Or will fate prevent them from admitting to their paradoxical attraction? Please Read and REVIEW!!

**Behind Closed Doors**

_Prologue: From My Side of Things_

My name is Lavender Brown and I pride myself on being a very strong-willed individual. I am twenty-six years old and I work for the Ministry of Magic, though I can't specify what exactly it is that I do. I have a few good friends, one best friend and a two year old daughter, whom I love more than life and whose father denies her. To this day, I don't understand what he saw in me and honestly, I never believed I had a chance with him. I guess I was right after all, considering the turn of events. I mean, I was this silly girl who had to grow up fast due to certain circumstances. I was tall for a girl, sensitive, easily attached and clumsy. He was this…ebony _Adonis _carved from chocolate. There is no other way to describe him. He was gorgeous…and he still is…even more so, at least on the outside. The number of women who fall at his feet proves just how fine he really is. But he can be cruel at times and he left me with our precious child to show it. Here is the story of how I fell hopelessly, undeniably, irrevocably in love with a liar…

_Chapter 1 – Undeniable Attraction_

It was a crisp, colorful autumn afternoon in late October of our seventh year. All classes were dismissed and various school committees were milling about the castle in groups pairs and groups of three. Otherwise, they were outside enjoying a game of Fanged Frisbee or sitting in the shade provided by the beautiful trees on the Hogwarts grounds. The Headmaster, who _unfortunately _happened to be Professor Snape, had made it clear that flying on broomsticks was not allowed unless it was during a supervised Quidditch practice or match. Some people actually thought of sneaking, but changed their minds. You don't cross Professor Snape. It's something that just isn't done.

It was too perfect of a day. I should have known that something would go wrong. Aside from class work and homework, I had duties to fulfill. We were in the middle of a war. Lord Voldemort hadn't yet been defeated and there were still things to be done by Hogwarts students other than Harry, Ron and Hermione. Later tonight, I was to meet Neville Longbottom, Luna Lovegood, Terry Boot, Hannah Abbott and Zacharias Smith, who had taken the place of Ernie McMillan because the Snatchers got him, in the Room of Requirement to plan an attack and escape on the Callows.

The Callows were a brother/sister pair of Death Eaters appointed by Lord Voldemort to torture us students into supporting his regime. However, there weren't many students left; the Snatchers had taken several of my friends due to their blood statuses. Ernie is a muggleborn, so he was one of the firsts on the list. Some managed to escape and were now on the run. Parvati's boyfriend, Dean Thomas was among those. The only house that was entirely full and untouched was Slytherin.

I peered outside the window at Colin Creevey, Ginny Weasley, Luna and several other students wrestling each other in huge piles of colorful leaves. At that moment, I would have given anything to be up in my dormitory sleeping. But since I'm not as dense as people believe me to be, instead I sat in the library studying for the upcoming N.E.W.T's exams. Nastily Exhausting is right. Whoever made those tests standard definitely had too much time and energy on their hands. I would have thought that they would be cancelled because school's not quite normal this year, but Professor McGonagall says that life must go on.

Looking back, I realize that I wasn't acting quite like myself. I mean, it was out of character for me to be studying for any exam six months prior; it was definitely more Hermione-like. However, I had planned to turn a new leaf for my final year in school. And I seriously wondered how long the new me would last.

I spotted Padma Patil to my left, deeply engrossed in a thick volume of some unknown series. _She _was definitely the type to study everyday just for the hell of it. She could've given Hermione competition for the "Most Clever Witch…" title. Her perfectly shaped eyebrows were furrowed in concentration as she poured over the ample pages, Batilda Bagshot's _A History of Magic _long forgotten or accomplished. To my right, my best friend and Padma's identical twin sister, Parvati, was doodling aimlessly on her half-filled parchment. I peeked over to see Dean Thomas' name written in her neat hand, then Parvati Anne Thomas in different variations of script. I chuckled to myself at something I normally would have squealed at. Had this been one year ago, I would have been jumping all over the opportunity to drag Parvati to the crystal ball to decipher her future with Dean. But now, seeing her write his name like that made me sad because I knew she missed him and was immensely worried.

One of the Callows glared at me and I feigned interest in my notes, frowning in mock concentration to be convincing.

_This school's gone to the bloody bulls. _I mused sourly.

If McGonagall were to walk in right now, she would tell the Callows that they had no right to bully her students. But she wasn't here, so I hastily resumed my reading…or my "pretending" at least. What they didn't know could only hurt me on the day of the N.E.W.T's and that was none of their concern. I was hardly taking anything in anyway.

My mind was elsewhere, auto piloting in that ozone layer they taught us about in Muggle Studies during fifth year. I was specifically thinking about the War, wondering if Harry, Ron and Hermione were okay and we all would make it out of this ordeal alive. I looked over to the empty chairs of where they usually sat in the library and felt a pang. I wasn't best friends with any of them for the entire previous six years here at Hogwarts, however, a certain fondness of my three fellow Gryffindors had made a home somewhere inside me. After all, I _had _been Ron's girlfriend for a while. I thought of his red head and brilliant, blue eyes and felt the corners of my mouth lift. Although there was a chance he would be back, however slim, I actually missed him.

The three of them spent every other week away from the castle to search for something called horcruxes. Sometime they'd be gone for several weeks. While they were here, they took special classes taught in secret by teachers who weren't on Voldemort's side. These teachers wore Time Turners tucked under their robes to be able to teach the classes simultaneously with the regular ones. Of course no one, but a few of us knew that Harry, Hermione and Ron were here during those times. But the people who did always wore slight smiles and were happier when these times came.

A tear dropped unexpectedly from one of my eyes as I thought of those who were out there and may never return. Glancing furtively at Amycus Callow, I hastily swiped it with my finger.

_Pull yourself together, girl. _I harshly reprimanded myself, as I scribbled random notes on my parchment.

Suddenly, pulling myself together seemed to be a futile attempt because the intense heat I felt that could only be from another's eyes was my undoing. I lifted me eyes and they locked in on the lingering gaze of none other than Blaise Zabini. It seemed as though his long, slanting, dark eyes had burned a hole into my brain and left a bit of himself…because now I couldn't stop thinking about him. I knew that my thoughts would be occupied with him until further notice. It wasn't the first time he'd done this to me.

_His _eyes_…they're _beautiful…

They were dark, almost black and penetrating. They possessed an iciness, yet were smoldering as he swept them over me. And they were so…focused and precise. Perfect…just like the rest of him.

I'd like to say that I'd first realized my attraction to Zabini that day, but now as I look back, I must admit that I was drawn to him long before that. Something about my liking of him made me nervous. It felt as though I was getting ready to take on an obstacle course that I wouldn't come out of. I felt that if I gave in to this feeling, it would be final and I'd never measure up.

He seemed so untouchable. Not only because he was in Slytherin, but also because he'd always seemed to regard himself as royalty…as though he were above all the teasing and mindless cruelty of the other Slytherins. I hate to admit it, but his moody countenance and arrogance were both attractive and frightening to me. I can't exactly tell what drew me to him so, because I don't know. But once he'd initiated my interest, there was no turning back. I guess it was the mysteriousness of the whole situation. He was impenetrable; it didn't seem as if anything fazed him. No reddening of his dark skin or faltering of his demeanor would expose him and I felt that if I could at least reach him how he so effortlessly reached me, I would accomplish something.

He was sitting with Malfoy, who had immersed himself gleefully in some Dark Arts textbook. The Restricted Section was now full of Muggle Studies texts and journals, instead of dangerous, Dark spell books. Those were floating around freely for any and every student to access. I glared at Malfoy with disdain so as not to be jolted by Zabini's intense gaze. Malfoy was safe. I _despised _him and that was the only thing I'd ever felt for him. It was easier to deal with than the opposing emotions that swam inside me when I encountered Zabini.

He was playing tug-a-war with me. He wanted my attention, because at that moment a shock of his thick, curly hair fell into his eyes and he brushed his away with a long, ebony finger, distracting me from my hateful glaring at Malfoy. It seemed as though the movement was done in slow motion to antagonize me.

I felt my cheeks grow hot, matching the temperature of his gaze and I knew they were brilliantly pink. I held his gaze, trying to discern the reason he had disturbed me so and if there _was _a reason at all. What was ironic about this whole game between the two of us was that I _knew _he was curious about me. Why else would he stare at me like that? The ardor in his eyes couldn't be a mistake. It was there, as plain as day. But although the interest was there, simultaneously they told me nothing. His thoughtful gaze was cold and froze my insides, while urging me to ask for more.

_More of _what? I asked myself. _Him? No way…_

Because if I knew what was good for me, I would have never fooled with him.

I struggled not to shy away from his steady, dark eyes and just when I thought I'd finally had control, it slipped from my grasp when he dropped his eyelids and those long, thick lashes rested on his haughty cheekbones momentarily in a slow blink.

_He carries himself with such a…masculine sovereignty and grace. _I observed with a fondness that surprised me.

Malfoy nudged him, causing him to break our eye contact. He showed him some picture in the book he was reading and smirked. It was probably something awful and grotesque. He ran a pale, long fingered hand through his silky, white-blonde tresses.

Malfoy is good looking and I suppose…sexy. Like Zabini, he's tall and has well-defined muscles that clearly show his virility. He's got an aristocratic face and attitude to go with it, and his eyes are a magnificent icy, pale gray. But he's an obnoxious git and that makes him totally undesirable to people who aren't gluttons for unwarranted punishment. Zabini is obnoxious too, but he's more…quiet, which makes him more intriguing to me. They are both equally attractive physically; I guess it's just a matter of preference.

I rolled my eyes at them. Professor Snape had chosen Malfoy to be Head Boy. It was a given, so no one complained about it. I was sure that Pansy Parkinson would've gotten the title of Head Girl, but was pleasantly surprised when Hermione was chosen. It wasn't Snape who chose her at all, but rather Professor McGonagall. She had to fight; I'm sure and I'm glad she won at least that small battle. It was a good choice, after all, because despite being away for the majority of the time, Hermione was able to receive E's and O's on her schoolwork. I was in constant awe of Hermione; how she managed to spend only half of her time at school and maintain the grades she did was beyond me. She was truly a gifted witch.

I continued to watch Zabini out of the corner of my eye long after he'd stopped watching me. This was the fourth time this week I'd caught him checking me out. I tried to dismiss it as a fluke; you know maybe the War was getting to him as well. But it was getting harder and harder for me to ignore. It had become a constant, nagging question: _Why _in the name of Wizard was _Blaise Zabini_ staring at me more than he was doing anything else?

Shrugging off the jittery feeling that had consumed me and willing the butterflies to leave my stomach, I pulled my long red and brown curls over my left shoulder and continued on with my notes.

A/N: I know…it's a bit different. It's really supposed to be the sequel to To Fight for What's Yours, but I may make it into its own story with a lot of the same elements. As I said up top, please review. But DON'T flame me. Oh yeah, and I will try to make it less boring, if it is. The next chapter should be better. Thanks for reading.


	2. The Come and Go Room

Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/N: Hey, I'm back after a loooong hiatus. I still don't have much enthusiasm for writing, but I hope that by plugging along, I can regain some desire to continue this story. Reviews, I need reviews. Come on people…help a sister out. Readers: If you want a better story, I need to know what you think. Writers: I know you feel me on this.

_Chapter 2 – The Come and Go Room_

Later that evening, I performed a Disillusionment Charm on myself and made for the Room of Requirement alone. I was to meet Neville and Luna there so that we could decide on a safe time for the next D.A. meeting and map out the lesson.

Neville had surprised us all and had grown into quite a brave and courageous young gentleman. He was the leader of our group. It was an unacknowledged title, but he was the only one who assumed the role and the rest of us just sort of…followed. In my opinion, it was a good decision and I think several other people think so as well…particularly Luna. Secretly, I think she has a thing for Neville.

I reached my destination without running into Filch or worse, any of the Callows or Professor Snape. Removing the Disillusionment Charm, I walked past the seventh floor stone wall twice, concentrating with all my might on anything we might need for our secret, albeit copious gathering. I was just about to pass a third time, thus admit entrance when a bright, white light flashed on the wall before me, startling me.

"Brown, hmm. Out of your common room unescorted," a cold, clear, snide voice echoed through the hallway.

I whirled around sharply and came face to face with my visual antagonizer.

"Zabini, what do you want?" I asked as goose bumps invaded my skin. "Where is your blonde attachment?"

I didn't plan on giving him the satisfaction of knowing that he'd just scared the wits out of me.

"You're out of bounds," he repeated. "I can take points from your house and report you to the Callows."

_I _know _that, you insufferably smug git. _

It's what I _wanted_ to say, but to be honest…he disquieted me, made me anxious and edgy.

I just stared at him, attempting to make him squirm, wanting to make him feel what I felt. Or to at least show some sign that he felt that way. It was a trick I'd learned from Professor Trelawney. I'd watched her do it to Harry in third year when she prophesized his death and to many other students, causing them to fear her just a little bit.

It didn't work. He just stared back at me with those freezing eyes that told me everything…and _nothing. _Pleading with me…shutting me out, all at the same time.

_Those _eyes _of his…they just won't let up._

_What are you hiding?_ I wanted to ask. _What do you need? Understanding? _

But I took the smart route instead. I kept him from learning of my secret yearning for him by using my sharp tongue. If I continued to dislike him, or at least manage to _convince _myself that I disliked him, I'd save myself a lot of trouble.

I felt a headache coming on. Squinting against the glare of his flashlight, I used my hand to shield my eyes.

"Could you shut that bloody thing off?" I snapped. "I'm starting to see spots."

Surprisingly he obeyed and we were once more immersed in the dim light of the candles anchored on the walls.

"Get to your tower," he barked. "Or I'm telling Professor Snape that you've been prowling."

_Rude prat!_

"I can go where I want, Zabini. In case you haven't noticed, I'm not a child."

His eyes swept over me in a way that suggested that he'd indeed noticed that I'm not a child and I shivered.

"Slytherin students are the only ones allowed in the halls without an escort at this hour." He took great care to remind me.

Annoyance boiled in the pit of my stomach. He was taking advantage of his position…like the rest of _them. _I don't know why I expected him to be different.

_Because you _want _him to be different… _

_Yeah…right._

A fake, but sweet smile crossed my face. "I'm sorry, I must have forgotten." My voice dripped honey. "I swear it won't happen again." With as much attitude as I could muster, I said, "Now if you'd be so kind as to excuse yourself, I was in the middle of something."

He raised a perfect eyebrow in disbelief and those butterflies were back in my stomach.

"_Excuse myself?"_

"I don't recall stuttering." I snapped.

I couldn't help it; he had that affect on me. My reaction to him was like an inverse reaction to winter air. People love winter air because it's crisp and refreshing, but the sharpness and biting cold often causes one to cuss in frustration.

I was drawn to him in such a powerful way, yet I was powerless to keep myself from being uncouth. It _frustrated _me; I didn't want to be anything like him and his lot.

He said nothing for a moment and I thought he was searching for a rude comeback. Slytherins never let people speak to them this way and I had already subconsciously steeled myself against his verbal wrath.

He eyed me cautiously, as if wondering if he should allot me free trespass and increasing my anxiety in his silence.

"What are you doing up here?"

His voice was cold, turning the blood in my veins to ice water.

Fighting against another shiver, I turned to face him once more, gave him another smile and replied in a light tone,

"That, Zabini, is on a 'need-to-know' basis…and you don't need to know."

He scowled and the temperature in the atmosphere, which was already about zero degrees since he'd invaded my space, dropped another degree.

"Let's see…twenty points from Gryffindor, I think," he said smoothly "Ten for cheekiness, five for insubordination and five for being a filthy half-blood."

"Fine," I sneered, already used to the name calling. I glanced up at the glass that held Gryffindor's rubies. It was empty.

"You can't _take _anymore points from us, you flagrant prick." I snapped, yet again. "Seeing as Gryffindors get no recognition for anything we do around here. You should tell your precious _Callows _that if they want to enjoy the perverse pleasure of subtracting points for no good reason, they'd better _give _points."

Again, he didn't immediately respond. Seeming to struggle with himself, as though he were having some sort of internal battle, he said,

"Come on then…get out of this corridor and I'll escort you back to Gryffindor tower."

"You mean as if we were on a _date?_" I was being sarcastic.

It threw him off course; he began to hesitate.

"No—what are you talking about?" he paused. "Of course not."

I smiled. It was fun to see him uncertain, if only a little.

"Look, you should get on…it's really not safe out here." He then added, as an afterthought, "For you."

"No." I said with finality. "I'm busy."

His demeanor changed from nonchalant to hard. "Consider yourself lucky that _I _found you, Brown, and not anyone else or it would have been detention. And you know what there doing to people in detention nowadays."

"Why am I lucky?" I asked sardonically. "Because you _like _me so much?"

Disgust marred his smooth features.

"I hardly like you."

I flipped him off. "Whatever."

I was darkly aware of the horrors of simple detentions nowadays. I thought of little Dennis Creevey, lying in the hospital wing recuperating from several bouts of the Cruciatus Curse at the wands of unwilling Dark Arts students, students whose parents risked their lives everyday for what's right, students who were Dennis' _friends. _

Blinking back tears, I looked up at Zabini. He was watching me, his features unreadable.

"I'm sure you know," he continued snidely, as though he'd read my mind. "Unless you wish to suffer the same fate, you'd better do as I say.

I eyed him quizzically. Was Zabini really so worried about me? Was he trying to protect me from the Callows?

I cocked my head to one side. "Why are you so concerned about my well-being?"

His expression changed so fast, that I think I caught whiplash witnessing it.

"I'm not," he sneered automatically, turning those disdainful eyes on me. "I won't be reprimanded for not punishing you properly. You seem to have made dire mistake of believing that I _care._" Cruel laughter slithered out of his beautiful mouth and coiled around my heart. "Not a chance."

I pretended that his words didn't hurt as my insides clenched painfully.

_He doesn't like me then. _I concluded, surprised by the forlorn feeling that consumed me at the thought. _But what of the staring? Was I reading into it too heavily?_

"_Sure, _Zabini." I bluffed. "But if that's true, you ought to have punished me already. You've had ample opportunity."

"Whatever," he said shortly. "Let's get in here, then. The Room of Requirement, that's where you're trying to go, isn't it?"

I eyed him suspiciously. Of _course_, I didn't trust him and I wasn't telling him anything. I recalled when Malfoy found us all in the Room of Requirement back in fifth year and I wasn't about to _willingly _give up our position now.

He stood there, his cold eyes examining me as he waited for my response. I glared defiantly back at him and he read my thoughts accordingly. Suddenly and surprisingly, he sighed.

"I understand; you don't have to tell me," he said, deciding to be human for once.

I studied him for a long moment.

"Is this some sort of joke?"

"No." he snapped, annoyed. Gesturing toward the newly materialized door, he said with an edge, "Get in…I hear footsteps."

His long, dark fingers closed around my forearm, pulling me toward the door. Immediately, something resembling an electric shock ran through me, halting my resistance,

I couldn't dwell on it for too long, however, because I too could hear what sounded like large footsteps advancing toward our direction. I didn't plan to find out if it was Filch.

_But it might be Neville and Luna! _My voice of reason screamed and I pulled away from Zabini's grip.

Too late, I couldn't chance it. They'd know to come in here anyway. But what would I do about Zabini?

He shoved me into a cozy room with squashy, navy armchairs. It wasn't the room that I had in mind, but it would have to do.

We stared at each other as my heart raced.

"That was close," he said. "You shouldn't be here."

I didn't respond as we listened for whomever to pass us. They did; it was a slow and steady gait that I was sure belonged to Filch.

"Have a seat." Zabini said, gesturing to one of the chairs.

"I—well…okay." I stammered, walking over and sitting down.

He just commanded me to sit, just like that. I usually don't allow people to boss me, but fear had muddled my brain.

_Who are you kidding? You know why you're speechless…_

Right…something about Zabini _made_ me speechless.

Not that I'd ever admit that out loud.

But I did wonder why he was so scared of me getting caught. He didn't _like _me; he'd made that crystal clear. Or…had he? I mean who stares at people they absolutely hate?

But…he'd never said that he hated me. He just said he didn't _care _about me.

_Come off it, Lavender._

That voice of reason again

I peered at him; he was watching me again. I crossed my legs to appear more ladylike, suddenly aware of how long and straight they were.

He sat down across from me and continued to gaze at me in that same curious manner that he had in the library. His dark eyes seemed to draw in my entire appearance. They swept over my hair and face, igniting that familiar sensation of nervous passion and reddening my cheeks once more.

There they were again; the butterflies were invading my stomach.

I shifted in my seat and began to play with the turquoise crystals on one of my bracelets. I felt vulnerable and uncomfortable. My feelings were exposed, or at least that's what I thought, while he was virtually impenetrable. I was fine when we were out in an open space and I could hide my obvious attraction to him behind sarcasm.

But now, in the dim light of the room and the atmosphere so private and…_intimate_, things were changed.

"Why are you wearing your school robes?" he asked, his haughty voice piercing the thick silence.

"Huh?"

_Charming, Lav._

"It's late, nearly midnight." He stated, matter-of-factly. "Why are you still dressed for school?"

I stopped playing with my bracelet and peered more closely at him. I was now even more intrigued by the quiet Slytherin boy. What made him tick? After all, he'd never really said much…just an insult to any stray non-Slytherin student here and there. He'd always blended in with the other Slytherins, sitting regally in the background while Draco Malfoy basked in the limelight of the mindless teasing. Suddenly his appeal was tainted as I remembered that he was connected to Lord Voldermort. I realized that my judgment had been temporarily impaired and my sardonic rhetoric returned.

"Who are you…the fashion police?" I sneered. "_You're_ still dressed too."

"_I'm _also on duty." He answered.

"And I'm the only person in the entire school who needs to be watched." I said snidely.

His long, dark lashes lowered and if he were pale, I could tell that he would have been crimson now.

"Of course not," his voice was quiet. "You'd love that, wouldn't you?"

Before I could retort, he changed the subject.

"Why were you trying to get in here? If you tell me, I might be gracious enough not to give you away."

"Blackmail." I said flatly. "Frankly, I'm not surprised."

"Nor should you be."

"Smooth Zabini, real smooth." I said seriously. "Too bad…I'm afraid it's none of your business."

He stared at me and his eyes…tore into me once more.

"Whatever." He looked away. Nonchalance again.

To tell the truth, I secretly felt a rush at the fact that he'd picked me to be interested in, however unrealistic it might be. Any sort of interest was good enough for me. I was pathetic.

"Are you through with the interrogation?" I asked, feigning boredom. "Because I really need to get on; I have better things to be doing with my time.

Before I lost my resolve, I stood up and made for the door. However, before I could reach it, he grabbed my arm and forcefully spun me around to face him.

I gasped as he pressed his lean body up against mine. I could feel the hard muscles of his chest against the softness of mine and my breath chose that moment to abandon me. I could smell his scent…mint, wood and something unfamiliar, like a sweet smoky musk. My palms grew sweaty and the little thumping in my temple quickened. Heat enveloped me, my ears, my neck, my cheeks…everywhere. I was sure he could feel it radiating off of my body.

His dark eyes glistened, burning into mine and suddenly…his lips were close to my ear….making my heart pound with excitement and fear…heat collected between my legs...

_What the _hell _was going on?_

I was losing myself.

"Don't get yourself into trouble, Brown," he murmured, his warm breath, the smooth deepness of his voice and his intoxicating scent making me pleasantly dizzy, although every nerve ending in my body was on red alert. Tingles crept up and down my spine.

"Be respectful and I might spare you." He ran a finger up my cheek. "I'll see you around."

My eyes widened. Did that mean he was going to report me to Snape?

I looked at him once more before breaking free for his grasp and fleeing from the room.

A/N: Chapter two…finally finished. Hope you like it. Please review.

T.R.


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